Happy 10th Anniversary...to us.

I am so so so behind but that's nothing new. I have so much to talk about and don't really know where to begin. I'm just going to skip it all for now. A big date is approaching.

Tomorrow Neil and I will have been married 10 years, together 16 years. It's funny because here we are celebrating our 10th and we should be going on a trip to somewhere tropical (we didn't go on a honeymoon and still haven't been anywhere romantic alone, but one day we will and it will be fantastic) but instead we are painting rooms and moving around furniture to make room for our 3rd sweet baby. So things don't always go as planned. Something I know very very well, so it's not a surprise. I honestly don't think I would want it any other way right now. What a wonderful way to celebrate 10 years, preparing for another little miracle into our family.

Let's see... We were married 10 years ago in Champaign, IL at a beautiful Presbyterian church. 350 guests packed the church on the hottest day of the year. I remember so clearly watching the 10:00 news at mom and dad's the night before seeing the forecast for July 3rd calling for 97 degree temperatures. Unfortunately, they were right on, too. No breeze, just hot and humid. Oh, and I don't think I mentioned that our church didn't have air conditioning. Not something we thought about when booking the church in December. Oops. Lesson learned with that one, and one that we can hopefully pass down to all our kids.

(Neil and I at the church, 9 years later...shot last summer by my friend Erin.)

But it was a beautiful ceremony, I must say. All 6 of my girls looked amazing in their ivory dresses and carrying blue flowers. My flower girls, Ashley and Taylor, the cutest little flower girls ever. My dear friend, Kristin, sang John Denver's Follow Me (one that was sang at my parents' wedding making it extra special) and Bette Midler's Rose. My grandma Libby was at the wedding as she fought off breast cancer, totally exhausted but would never miss my wedding for the world (she passed away 8 months later and I loved her dearly like a best friend). It was the hottest day of the year, and the shortest ceremony ever, but it was still very special, as it should be. I married my first love..my high school sweetheart, and here we are 10 years later reminiscing that day. Wow.

We've had some very challenging times, but I can say they all have only made us stronger. I'd never wish hard times on other couples but I have to say that it's really the only thing in a relationship that will force you to either come closer together or pull you apart. I'm thankful we made the choice for these challenges to bring us closer together. Our infertility, losing babies, and thinking we'd never have a family was a huge obstacle for us to make it through. But we did. I would have picked no one other than Neil to sit with me in the bathroom for hours as I lost a baby, and I wouldn't want anyone other than Neil to say "it's going to be okay". (I told him I didn't believe him, but in my heart, I did.) He's been my lifesaver...my strong tower...holding me up while I know he was dealing with the same intense pain as I.

I lost my two grandmothers and my grandpa during our time together. I held my grandpas hand as he took his last breath, and Neil was there with me during that moment...the hardest moment in my life, I think. Neil lost two of his grandfathers. Those weren't easy times. Parts of both of us suddenly gone, in really, a very short time. And then there was Noah's birth, where I was intibated and put completed under; Neil unable to even be in the room as his son was cut out of my body. And then Maia's labor of 31 hours ending with a c-section, in which of course he was next to my side through every minute of it. God's challenged us with a lot, still is...but He's also proven to us that we can get through just about anything with faith, compassion, patience, and love.

I'm so lucky to have someone who loves me as he does. He does so much for me. So much for our family. So often I think to myself "no one else would do this for me, I'm so lucky to have him" and then I say a prayer thanking God for my wonderful husband. He's the most amazing father taking so much time out to play with them, color with them, teaching Noah how to ride his bike, doing Maia's hair (when I know it isn't something on his "most exciting father moment" list), taking them grocery shopping so mommy can have some time to herself, taking them to the farmer's market to pick out flowers for mommy to plant, taking the kids somewhere while letting mommy sleep in bed all day when she is experiencing aches and pains, and the list goes on and on and on. I am truly truly blessed.

I could go on and on with this blog post, but I won't bore you more since I probably already have. I just wanted to give Neil the recognition he deserves. I love him so much and these 10 years, well, they've truly been the best years of my life.

I love you, Neilly. Happy 10th Anniversary.

Fifeteen & Nine...

I am a day early but that's because I have time right now. The next few days are going to be pretty busy with the 4th, the long weekend and we're going to the water park on Saturday --- woo-hoo! I think I'm looking more forward to that than the kids, but that's probably because I know what a water park is ;c)

Anyway, tomorrow is Neil and my 9th anniversary. 9 years ago we were married in an absolutely beautiful church. It was the hottest day of the year (not kidding when I say that, it was 97 degrees and high humidity) and guess what our church didn't have? Air conditioning. Well, we didn't think of that when we were booking the church in December! (note to file: always think ahead!)

So our wedding day was pretty memorable for all 400 of our guests (saying that with sarcasm). When we mention the day we were married people always say "I remember that! Boy it was hot!" Sometimes I think people forget that the bride (me) was in a big layered tulle dress which felt like it was 50 pounds, especially when you combined the dress itself with all the sweat coming off of my body. Thank goodness for my bridesmaid, Sara, who brought a hand-held fan for me. That fan spent a good majority of the day under my dress to cool my whithering hot body! :c)

But of course that day is also very memorable for us. We were together 6 years before we got married. We had known each other since we were 8. We grew up just a couple miles apart. We rode the same bus to school. But it wasn't till we were in high school that we found a little spark between us that would grow and then carry us through 15 years together. Wow.

While Erin and Jer were visiting we took them to the University of Illinois campus. It's such a beautiful campus. We didn't go to school there, but both our dads did, Neil's brother did, our sister-in-law did, a big handful of my friends, and about a half dozen of my family members. We both grew up on that campus in one way or another, going to basketball and football games or for whatever other reason. So it was fun showing the campus off to E & J. What was even more fun was showing them the church we got married in which is right off of campus. I am so thankful I had my camera with me (and some friends who could help me out!) because we had a picture taken on the steps of that church which I will forever be grateful for. It signifies so much.



This picture contains so much symbolism. Obviously it's the church that we were married in . . .the steps that we both walked down after we were pronounced husband and wife. But this picture, it symbolizes a love that is undying. That has weathered a few storms and is ready to weather more if we need to. It symbolizes two people who will forever be best friends. Who are still in love, but whose love has grown differently from that puppy love in high school to a love that is comfortably happy. It symbolizes that we will always try to stay on the top as long as we do it together . . . two people who can't be strong together if we aren't the people we were made to be individually first. After 15 years together, we've made it through a lot. I think we're ready to take on whatever else life will lead us into.

God has blessed us. Amazingly, we triumphed infertility and loss and are at a point in our lives that I truly never ever thought I would see. This family . . .























So happy anniversary to my forever dear Neilly. I love you so much. Thank you for loving our kids, thank you for loving me. You are the best husband and daddy a woman would ever ever want. I am so thankful for you.