Happy 10th Anniversary...to us.

I am so so so behind but that's nothing new. I have so much to talk about and don't really know where to begin. I'm just going to skip it all for now. A big date is approaching.

Tomorrow Neil and I will have been married 10 years, together 16 years. It's funny because here we are celebrating our 10th and we should be going on a trip to somewhere tropical (we didn't go on a honeymoon and still haven't been anywhere romantic alone, but one day we will and it will be fantastic) but instead we are painting rooms and moving around furniture to make room for our 3rd sweet baby. So things don't always go as planned. Something I know very very well, so it's not a surprise. I honestly don't think I would want it any other way right now. What a wonderful way to celebrate 10 years, preparing for another little miracle into our family.

Let's see... We were married 10 years ago in Champaign, IL at a beautiful Presbyterian church. 350 guests packed the church on the hottest day of the year. I remember so clearly watching the 10:00 news at mom and dad's the night before seeing the forecast for July 3rd calling for 97 degree temperatures. Unfortunately, they were right on, too. No breeze, just hot and humid. Oh, and I don't think I mentioned that our church didn't have air conditioning. Not something we thought about when booking the church in December. Oops. Lesson learned with that one, and one that we can hopefully pass down to all our kids.

(Neil and I at the church, 9 years later...shot last summer by my friend Erin.)

But it was a beautiful ceremony, I must say. All 6 of my girls looked amazing in their ivory dresses and carrying blue flowers. My flower girls, Ashley and Taylor, the cutest little flower girls ever. My dear friend, Kristin, sang John Denver's Follow Me (one that was sang at my parents' wedding making it extra special) and Bette Midler's Rose. My grandma Libby was at the wedding as she fought off breast cancer, totally exhausted but would never miss my wedding for the world (she passed away 8 months later and I loved her dearly like a best friend). It was the hottest day of the year, and the shortest ceremony ever, but it was still very special, as it should be. I married my first love..my high school sweetheart, and here we are 10 years later reminiscing that day. Wow.

We've had some very challenging times, but I can say they all have only made us stronger. I'd never wish hard times on other couples but I have to say that it's really the only thing in a relationship that will force you to either come closer together or pull you apart. I'm thankful we made the choice for these challenges to bring us closer together. Our infertility, losing babies, and thinking we'd never have a family was a huge obstacle for us to make it through. But we did. I would have picked no one other than Neil to sit with me in the bathroom for hours as I lost a baby, and I wouldn't want anyone other than Neil to say "it's going to be okay". (I told him I didn't believe him, but in my heart, I did.) He's been my lifesaver...my strong tower...holding me up while I know he was dealing with the same intense pain as I.

I lost my two grandmothers and my grandpa during our time together. I held my grandpas hand as he took his last breath, and Neil was there with me during that moment...the hardest moment in my life, I think. Neil lost two of his grandfathers. Those weren't easy times. Parts of both of us suddenly gone, in really, a very short time. And then there was Noah's birth, where I was intibated and put completed under; Neil unable to even be in the room as his son was cut out of my body. And then Maia's labor of 31 hours ending with a c-section, in which of course he was next to my side through every minute of it. God's challenged us with a lot, still is...but He's also proven to us that we can get through just about anything with faith, compassion, patience, and love.

I'm so lucky to have someone who loves me as he does. He does so much for me. So much for our family. So often I think to myself "no one else would do this for me, I'm so lucky to have him" and then I say a prayer thanking God for my wonderful husband. He's the most amazing father taking so much time out to play with them, color with them, teaching Noah how to ride his bike, doing Maia's hair (when I know it isn't something on his "most exciting father moment" list), taking them grocery shopping so mommy can have some time to herself, taking them to the farmer's market to pick out flowers for mommy to plant, taking the kids somewhere while letting mommy sleep in bed all day when she is experiencing aches and pains, and the list goes on and on and on. I am truly truly blessed.

I could go on and on with this blog post, but I won't bore you more since I probably already have. I just wanted to give Neil the recognition he deserves. I love him so much and these 10 years, well, they've truly been the best years of my life.

I love you, Neilly. Happy 10th Anniversary.

Fifeteen & Nine...

I am a day early but that's because I have time right now. The next few days are going to be pretty busy with the 4th, the long weekend and we're going to the water park on Saturday --- woo-hoo! I think I'm looking more forward to that than the kids, but that's probably because I know what a water park is ;c)

Anyway, tomorrow is Neil and my 9th anniversary. 9 years ago we were married in an absolutely beautiful church. It was the hottest day of the year (not kidding when I say that, it was 97 degrees and high humidity) and guess what our church didn't have? Air conditioning. Well, we didn't think of that when we were booking the church in December! (note to file: always think ahead!)

So our wedding day was pretty memorable for all 400 of our guests (saying that with sarcasm). When we mention the day we were married people always say "I remember that! Boy it was hot!" Sometimes I think people forget that the bride (me) was in a big layered tulle dress which felt like it was 50 pounds, especially when you combined the dress itself with all the sweat coming off of my body. Thank goodness for my bridesmaid, Sara, who brought a hand-held fan for me. That fan spent a good majority of the day under my dress to cool my whithering hot body! :c)

But of course that day is also very memorable for us. We were together 6 years before we got married. We had known each other since we were 8. We grew up just a couple miles apart. We rode the same bus to school. But it wasn't till we were in high school that we found a little spark between us that would grow and then carry us through 15 years together. Wow.

While Erin and Jer were visiting we took them to the University of Illinois campus. It's such a beautiful campus. We didn't go to school there, but both our dads did, Neil's brother did, our sister-in-law did, a big handful of my friends, and about a half dozen of my family members. We both grew up on that campus in one way or another, going to basketball and football games or for whatever other reason. So it was fun showing the campus off to E & J. What was even more fun was showing them the church we got married in which is right off of campus. I am so thankful I had my camera with me (and some friends who could help me out!) because we had a picture taken on the steps of that church which I will forever be grateful for. It signifies so much.



This picture contains so much symbolism. Obviously it's the church that we were married in . . .the steps that we both walked down after we were pronounced husband and wife. But this picture, it symbolizes a love that is undying. That has weathered a few storms and is ready to weather more if we need to. It symbolizes two people who will forever be best friends. Who are still in love, but whose love has grown differently from that puppy love in high school to a love that is comfortably happy. It symbolizes that we will always try to stay on the top as long as we do it together . . . two people who can't be strong together if we aren't the people we were made to be individually first. After 15 years together, we've made it through a lot. I think we're ready to take on whatever else life will lead us into.

God has blessed us. Amazingly, we triumphed infertility and loss and are at a point in our lives that I truly never ever thought I would see. This family . . .























So happy anniversary to my forever dear Neilly. I love you so much. Thank you for loving our kids, thank you for loving me. You are the best husband and daddy a woman would ever ever want. I am so thankful for you.

Shelby

A Dog's Prayer

Treat me kindly, my beloved master
for no heart in all the world
is more grateful for kindness
than the loving heart of me.


Do not break my spirit with a stick,
for though I should lick your hand between blows,
your patience and understanding
will more quickly teach me the things you would have me do.
Speak to me often, for your voice is the world's sweetest music,
as you must know by the fierce wagging of my tail when
your footstep falls upon my waiting ear.


When it is cold and wet, please take me inside....
for I am now a domesticated animal. No longer used to bitter elements...
and I ask no greater glory than the privilege of sitting
at your feet beside the hearth...
though had you no home in all the land...for you are my god...
and I am your devoted worshipper.


Keep my pan filled with fresh water, for although
I should not reproach you were it dry,
I cannot tell you when I suffer thirst.


Feed me clean food, that I may stay well to romp and play
and do your bidding, to walk by you side,
and stand ready, willing and able to protect you with my life,
should your life be in danger.


And beloved master, should the Great Master see fit
to deprive me of my health or sight, do not turn me away from you.
Rather, hold me gently in your arms as skilled hands
grant me the merciful boon of eternal rest...
and I will leave you knowing with the last breath I draw,
my fate was ever safest in your hands.


My mom did one of the hardest things a human being can do. She chose selflessly to put our family dog, Shelby, down today. Shelby like many of our dogs, was a best friend. She was mom's best friend. She literally stood by her through some of the hardest times of her life even through today. Mom said the hardest thing she has ever done was put Shelby down. After 17 years, her body was wearing down. She could no longer see, could not hear well, and most likely had unbeatable health issues. Today was hard for me just knowing mom was doing it. I prayed as often as I could. I didn't want mom to feel alone, even though I did tell her I would go with her. But she wanted to be alone. Anyway, I can't ramble on because it makes me cry harder. But I can't just let Shelby go. She's been in my life for many years, too. I still remember the day we brought her home. My brother and friend, Kara, were with us. Shelby was the runt and Shelby just picked us. What an amazing little white ball of fur she was. I will miss her desperately, but I know my mom will miss her ever so much more. Please keep mom in your prayers. Letting go of a pet is not an easy thing to do . . .

Thank you, Shelby, for being the best "sister" I could ask for.

Shelby was always a good helper. Here is mom with Shelby by her side helping her plant flowers one spring :c) She was always always by mom's side. And she forever will be . . .

true love + bun in the oven = radiance, joy, fun

"You can select [friends] at random, write to one, dine with one, visit one, or take your problems to one. There is always at least one who will understand, inspire, and give you the lift you may need at the time." -- George Matthew Adams

I love that quote. Corie is my friend who inspires and makes me laugh. She is the sweetest girl ever who inspires me to be as kind-hearted and loving as possible because that's what she does.

I had the great opportunity to photograph her wedding a few years ago and I was overwhelmed in a good way with the love she and Keith had for each other. Sometimes you just know instinctively whether a marriage is going to last or not . . . whether they're in it for the right reasons. Because quite frankly, a lot of marriages are not for the right reasons. Corie and Keith were definitely in it for the right reasons. They were made for each other. They both put the other person first and complement each other perfectly as marriage and love should. You could just see it the way one glanced out of the corner of their eye at the other. Their eyes sparkled. It was so so so much fun to be the photographer who got to capture that with them. What an amazing couple.

Sunday I get to capture it all again but in a new way, and I absolutely can't wait. They are about to have their first baby and I get to photograph that love again plus the little one they created in Corie's beautiful belly. Isn't she the cutest ever?!

Since Corie and I are friends (Keith, too!) we're going to have such a fun time. I always do with people I already know well (a benefit to me shooting their weddings -- hint, hint, to future couples!). When I know people well in my shoots, I always want to try new things. Couples who know me know that I love to do new things. They are usually really comfortable with me and are open to my ideas and some even have ideas of their own. My favorite maternity couples as to date who were all for doing new fun things are on my website under "maternity".

I have a new (awesome fun clever -- yay me!) idea already in my head of something I've never tried before and never seen other photographers try. But I would love even more new and fun ideas. If you have any, please comment! What photographer doesn't love to try new things? (An idea inspiration: she is having a girl.)

As for my next digital photography 101 post, it's still in the works. I am waiting on a few things before I post, so I'm sorry about the delay in posting, which was suppose to be done over the weekend. Neil is in Atlanta, so it may take me a bit longer. We'll see. Maybe free time will magically appear?? :c)

p.s. Got the new cam and I'm loving it :c)

What is your love language?

I feel loved when...

The Five Love Languages

My Primary Love Language is Acts of Service

My Detailed Results:
Acts of Service:	9
Receiving Gifts:	8
Quality Time:	8
Words of Affirmation:	5
Physical Touch:	0

About this quiz

Unhappiness in relationships is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. It can be helpful to know what language you speak and what language those around you speak.

Tag 3 people so they can find out what their love language is.

Take the Quiz!
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Happy Birthday to someone special!

My mom (on the right) with her Aunt Glenda (left) at Halloween (is that right, mom?) dressed as Dennis and Iodine from Dennis the Menace. Aren't they cute?!

Well, today is a pretty important day here. It's my mom's 55th birthday! And I can't hardly believe that. For me it seems like just yesterday that she was brushing my foot-long hair and putting it in pig tails.

I met my mom when she was 23 (I was zero . . . hehe). When our eyes met they must've said "I'm yours and you're mine" because that's how we've been for over 31 years. When I was younger I never wanted to leave her side. I see now how that was from a mother's perspective as Maia is that way with me right now. And I'm loving it. I see now why she loved it so much. That bond from the beginning as mother-daughter turned into a true and amazing friend relationship. Yeah, I didn't have a choice who my mother was, like with friends you have choices, but God knew who would be best for me just as He knew who would be best for her. And then we CHOSE to become friends. That's what I love.

As a toddler and especially as a teenager, you don't always appreciate your mother. I know there were times I didn't. I always knew she loved me, though. And I think that's what matters most in any relationship, knowing you are truly loved, especially a mother/father son/daughter relationship. Actually, to me, that's what matters most in any relationship. Love is what life is based around. It truly is what makes the world go round.

And yes, there have also been times I have not liked her, but I can say now (you know, you never see it then) that the times I got mad at her were only because she was looking out for my best interest.

I've always been her best interest. Those that love us do what they do for us because they think it's what's best for us. And my mom, she has never given up on me and has loved me through every step of my life. And I thank her for this. Not many daughters have mothers like mine. And I can say I really really do appreciate her now and what she's done for me. I look back on so many great memories and they are all planted in my head and heart because of her, and because of her love for me.

I also know how special my mom is because people remind me. Especially my children. They remind me because that's all they talk about sometimes is "grandma". I see their eyes light up when they see her (especially when they go to her house because adventure lies there!), and I have this feeling that I will see their eyes light up like this for forever more. And what a great feeling that is. Mostly because now I know how mom felt when we looked so forward to seeing my grandma Libby (mom's mom).

Mom and grandma had the closest relationship. Grandma was the one who showed my mom what love was all about. What strength was all about. What giving was all about.

My mom's father died when she was 12 . . . at one of the weakest times in a girls life. My grandma took over raising mom and her toddler brother all by herself. She did it all with such strength and I know that strength and love just radiated from her.

Grandma loved no one more than her children. And that is why my mom is who she is today and why I'm who I am today. I am me, and everything that lies within me, because of them. I can honestly say that it's because of them that I am who I am today. Two of the most special women ever to walk into my life. And I won't stop looking to them to guide me.

Grandma died in 2000 after a long long battle with breast cancer. But I can tell you, that she still guides me. When I'm battling something inside me at times, I will ask myself what grandma would do. It is never hard for me to find the answer. She was that wise of a women. Oh how I miss her.

Mom, grandma & myself (and we can't forget Shelby!) just a few months before grandma passed away.

Happy Birthay, Mom. I love you. And I know grandma loves you so much and is so very proud of you like I am.

This is grandma and her sister, Katherine (a.k.a. Aunt Kack to me). Grandma stands on the right. She was the oldest of 5 siblings. Kack is next, then Carolyn (a.k.a. Aunt Sue to me), then Butch, and then Glenda (who is pictures above with my mom). Of course Glenda was not born yet . . . she and mom are just a year apart in age!