1.15.2008

Just 2-1/2 more days . . .

. . . and hubby leaves for China. {deep sigh}

I'm so nervous. Very very nervous. Don't ask me why because my answer consists of a half-dozen different reasons. (Just ask Alexis.) But I feel guilty for feeling how I feel because so many women suffer way more than I do when their husbands leave for months or years at a time. I feel extremely blessed in that way because I know that will never happen to me. But selfishly I am really nervous and scared. Scared for him, not me. I know I can handle it. It will be harder than normal and my work will have to stop for 9 days, but I know I can do it. And it's not that I don't think Neil can't handle the travel and China itself. I know he can. But I'm scared about the things not in his control, like his safety and health. I am also scared for myself in the way that I am not sure I can mentally handle my kids 24-7 for that long. Yes, I am a stay-at-home mom, but when Neil gets home in the evenings, I begin working about 6:00 and when I start working, I work. And I'm in my office. And Neil plays and takes care of the kids. It's my only break in the day. A break I need. And I'm a little afraid about how I will handle not having that break for 9 days. I love my kids more than anything in the world, but I also like to be mentally, emotionally and physically able to take care of them as I should.

Anyhow, 2-1/2 days before he leaves on an 18-hr flight to China. (Yeah, I'm counting that 1/2 day.) Please keep Neil (and selfishly, me also) in your prayers come Friday. He's going to be clear on the other side of this Earth for 9 days. When I say that, I think, "yep, it's just a dream. He's really not going." But I'm pretty sure he is.

When Neil left for Germany (for 6 days, I think it was), I shot these pictures of him and our kiddos as he was getting ready to leave the house. I love these pictures.



Matthew 11:28 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."

I Peter 9:7 "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."

10 comments:

Jennifer said...

Just keep yourself and the kids busy......time will fly by so fast. Just think Jan. 08 is almost over! We were just talking about Thanksgiving and what we were thankful for.

I hate when Jason leaves too...so just think I have 4 kids and I'm still typing to tell my story..LOL

I find it helpful to surround me and my children with other mommies with child, so my kids don't get sick of looking at me all the time. I go out to eat allot....zoo, science centers, anything to keep them busy.

All in my prayers...and two of my fav. scriptures...I always tell people worry is a sin, because we are not having the faith in HIM...and remember that SATAN is the one that robs us of all joy and puts doubts into our minds...he does it to me all the time..he hate happy!!!

Christy said...

I'll be praying for you! Don't feel guilty about feeling this way, he's your other half! And it's ok to let your kids watch a movie and eat popcorn in the evening so you can get a break :) Or go the craft store and get a special project for them.

Johanna said...

Oh Val... I so wish that i lived close so that I could come over and help you! Think of something fun that you will want to do each day and then you will always have something to look forward to. Then, before you know it, he will be home! You can do it girl, I know you can! I'll be praying for you guys.

mama2dibs said...

I just sent a magazine article to a friend, who's husband travels a lot, about moms at home while hubby is traveling. I wish I would have gotten copies of it (I thought about it, but then decided against it because Chris doesn't travel anymore) so I could send you a copy.

Hang in there and I will pray for you both.

Michelle said...

I know we've talked lots about this already, so I won't say a whole lot. But, do know, that you will be in our thoughts and prayers! We love you all! Safe travels to Neil!

Our Home Schooler and Jen said...

praying for you and Neil

Jen

Unknown said...

Thank you friends. Thank you for your comments here and via email. You're all so wonderful.

As the days get closer, the more anxious I get. Neil is even anxious which is really unusual, which of course just makes me feel dandy. :-/

Some good news that makes me feel like the trip will be worthwhile is, today he found out ADM has booked him a private scenic tour of Shanghai and he'll also get to see the Great Wall of China as they have to drive along it for quite a ways. He will be visiting 4 cities and flying across the country of China for one visit. Should be interesting and I know he'll keep busy. I just hope we survive here!

Missy!! said...

Oh wow!! I must admit.. I'm completely jealous!! Besides, think positively.. he is going what.. five months before the summer Olympics hit Beijing? Therefore most stuff will already be translated into English.. he is traveling with work, so they'll keep fairly tight strings on him.. and it is a vacation of a lifetime! He will have a blast! And think of his homecoming! His children will be overjoyed to see him.. not to mention his wife! Being the fab. husband you always rave about, I'm sure he'll make it all up to you in the end! But do tell him to take TONS of pictures.. I'm dying to head to China! Good luck and great travels Neil! You'll survive Val, if he brings you to it.. he'll bring you through it!! :)

Corie said...

((HUGS)) to you Val! I like the two verses that you posted at the end. Cling to those and He will see you through this.
I'll be keeping you in my prayers!!!

Alexis Jacobs said...

You know I am thinking of you girl. Call me anytime... day or night ((hugs))